the backstage epiphany

where reality is so subjective it's entirely optional

Monthly Archives: October 2006

Baby of mine

When I was still an only child, my mother was studying for her Masters in Anaesthesiology at the University Hospital, and I was old enough to know when she was and wasn’t around. So on the nights before she went on call, she would put me to bed and sing the song Baby Mine from the Walt Disney animated movie Dumbo, and even though it made me bawl my eyes out, it still made me feel better.

I suppose after all these years I’m still a little mother’s girl, because even now, whenever I hear that song now I still cry and think of how close we’ve always been, and how she always told me in secret that even though she loves my younger brother, she would still love me better.  Now that she’s all the way on the other side of the world, and I’m facing such uncertain times, I know I would sell my soul to have her put me to bed and sing Baby Mine to me again.

Baby mine, don’t you cry
Baby mine, dry your eyes
Rest your head close to my heart
Never to part, baby of mine
Little one, when you play
Don’t you mind what you say
Let those eyes sparkle and shine
Never a tear, baby of mine
From your head to your toes
You’re so sweet, goodness knows
You are so precious to me
Cute as can be, baby of mine

The snowstorm that was

Let there be light

And there was light!

The electricity finally came back on, after 45 hours of living like cavemen. And not a moment too soon, either. You know times are bad when every single library on both North and South Campus is closed. Some places like Boulevard Suites and Campus Manor Apartments still don’t have power yet, and apparently neither does the area around South Camp. Hopefully everything will be back up and running soon. Luna lives in Boulevard Suites, and Aziza in Campus Manor, and am feeling awful for them because they’re still living like neanderthals. On a brighter note, there still won’t be classes tomorrow, so everyone is rejoicing in that. Although it makes no difference to self, as am supposed to submit an assignment for COM441 via the UBLearns Digital Dropbox tomorrow anyway.

White noise

Has been a depressing 17 hours. It started snowing yesterday afternoon, most unexpectedly, and it didn’t stop until late last night. Went home from Choir and Pitches rehearsals to discover that there had been a power outtage since 5PM, and the entire area around Copley Court was in total darkness. Discovered this morning that the power was still out, and it’s apparently so bad that everywhere else has power outtages as well, and it could take up to next week for everything to be back up and running. Even classes on campus have been cancelled, and only the library is open, and that only until 4PM.

Naturally had to get out of the house today to get food, but naturally the car was snowed in, so had to enlist the help of a neighbor, who was also trying to go out, to excavate the car out of the snow. Am now dreading going home as am not sure how to get back into the parking lot.

Life is unfair.

Still I Rise

by Maya Angelou

You may write me down in history
With your bitter, twisted lies
You may trod me in the very dirt
But still, like dust, I’ll rise

Does my sassiness upset you?
Why are you beset with gloom?
‘Cause I walk like I’ve got oil wells
Pumping in my living room

Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I’ll rise

Did you want to see me broken?
Bowed head and lowered eyes?
Shoulders falling down like teardrops
Weakened by my soulful cries

Does my haughtiness offend you?
Don’t you take it awful hard
‘Cause I laugh like I’ve got gold mines
Diggin’ in my own back yard

You may shoot me with your words
You may cut me with your eyes
You may kill me with your hatefulness
But still, like air, I’ll rise

Does my sexiness upset you?
Does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I’ve got diamonds
At the meeting of my thighs?

Out of the huts of history’s shame
I rise
Up from a past that’s rooted in pain
I rise
I’m a black ocean, leaping and wide
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide
Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that’s wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave
I am the dream and the hope of the slave
I rise

Trying to prioritize

This past weekend was a good one. Became productive and actually cleaned the entire house on Saturday, and got the laundry done — although in all honesty it was the mans did the laundry as he somehow didn’t see fit to wake me up to do it too — all in one afternoon. Then went for Maddi’s birthday party on Saturday night, which was pretty fun, as Shannyn and Aziza were there, and so were Ryan, Danny and PJ from the Chips.

Had Pitches rehearsal yesterday, which was rather pleasant for once because nobody was being stupid and bossy. Managed to learn a brand-new song, Hit Me With Your Best Shot, in a half-hour yesterday, which was a record because last semester it took weeks and weeks to learn new songs. Also had rehearsal today, which went relatively well except that the stupid and bossy people were there this time. But all in all, we’re finally doing something worthwhile in rehearsal besides just fucking around and being neanderthals.

In an extremely bad case of procrastination, have not really begun to look for jobs yet, which is very bad as is already October, and am determined to get a job by February so that am able to apply for the H-1 visa in April if am even harboring the remotest thought of staying in this country after graduation. Am applying for OPT (Optional Practical Training) status this week, so at least that’s out of the way. But first have simply got to get off the lazy behind and get the damn résumè critiqued for the last time.

Almost Famous

Went to school today to get some stuff done for OPT (Optional Practical Training) application, after which ran into Evan from the Buffalo Chips in the Student Union, who mentioned The Spectrum‘s article about the Pitches which came out last Friday, September 29. Had completely forgotten about it, so flew straight to the Spectrum Office to get several copies of it, as am supposed to send them home to the mother together with CDs.

The article was huge, taking up nearly half of Page 7, and even continuing on Page 8. It was also posted on The Spectrum Online.