the backstage epiphany

where reality is so subjective it's entirely optional

Daily Archives: April 19, 2010

Model for a day

Yesterday I was put through my first professional photoshoot for a new short film that Giovanni (the very same) is doing. Despite putting both feet down and insisting that I am not thin enough and do not photograph well, the producers insisted on getting some shots of me for publicity and film posters, and also to start my own portfolio (though what I would do with a portfolio is beyond me). So I sat and stood and smiled and pouted my way through five hours for a photographer who kept telling me to ‘seduce the camera’.

Several things that I deduced from this photoshoot:

1. I will never do this again.

2. If one is not photogenic, it does not matter how good the camera is.

3. My hair obeys everyone except me. Yesterday was the first time in possibly months that my hair actually looked good, thanks to the stylist, her teasing comb, and about nine ounces of hairspray.

4. Acting is infinitely easier than modeling. It was easier for me to play a prostitute in The Wait than it was to ‘look sexy’ for yesterday’s shoot.

5. The amateur work I did for some of my photography major friends back in Buffalo was nowhere near as difficult and nerve-wracking as it was modeling for a professional photographer.

6. Photoshoots are really not for people with bad and short tempers. There were moments when I almost let out a stream of expletives because I was tired of trying to act nice and cute with the girl who will be playing my friend in the film.

7. Photoshoots are also not for people who are self-conscious. Half the time I was busy wondering how I was going to strike any pose at all without looking at fat and unphotogenic as I knew I was. As the pictures below show, I failed spectacularly.

8. I need to lose weight. A lot of it. I hope the retouched photos will depict me looking at least 30% thinner.

Still, at the risk of facing the fashion firing squad — or just public humiliation — I am posting behind-the-scenes pictures anyway, because this is, after all, my first and last photoshoot.

At the end of all that, the photographer chirped, “You should do this more often! Build your portfolio!” which earned an almighty snort from me.